


Lost in the Motion

by asongstress1422



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Ballet, Clip, Competition, Dancing, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Kylo is a turd, Love/Hate, Music, Orphan Rey, Reality TV, Rey is all smiles, Romance, Sad, Secret Identity, So you think you can dance - Freeform, Video, YouTube, hugs for all of them
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-02
Updated: 2018-09-12
Packaged: 2019-04-17 07:36:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 20,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14184084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asongstress1422/pseuds/asongstress1422
Summary: When they say opposites attract they have no idea what they're talking about when elitist ballet dancer 'Kylo Ren' and mostly self-taught contemporary dancer Rey Johnson are paired together. With Maz Kanata as their coach and the whole world tuning to watch who will rise to the top and win this season of 'So You Think You Can Dance'.





	1. Bleeding Love

**Author's Note:**

> So...this came to me. I am not a dancer so I spent three days down the rabbit hole that is 'So You Think You Can Dance' clips on youtube and I bring you this. Please let me know what you think, it would be greatly appreciated.
> 
> All music, choreography, and video clips belong to their respective creators. I own nothing.

[Kylo's Aution](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4OR-n3Rg6E8)

The black haired man sat straight in his chair, his hands resting flat on his knees. Face composed his eyes focused intently on the interviewer who shifted slightly in her chair.

“Um, can we, can we get your name and age? Into the camera, if you please.”

His look questioned her intelligence as he minutely shifted his focus into the lens. “Kylo Ren, 24.”

“Oh, um, where are you from?” she asked quickly when he didn’t add anything else.

He sighed through his nose. “New York.”

“And have you always lived in New York? The city, I assume.”

He cut her a look before returning his focus to the camera. “No.”

The interview bit her tongue against a reply to the contempt she saw in his eyes. Instead, as corgially as she could, she smiled and asked. “And your parents? Are they happy you’ve made it so far in the competitions?”

His right hand fisted around the material of his suit pants. “I’m sure I don’t care.”

* * *

[Rey's Audtion](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a438sPVlonI) 

The bright faced young woman sat at the edge of her chair, nearly vibrating with exited energy, an infectious smile stretching her lips. “My name is Rey. I am 19 years old and I’ve been dancing on and off for the last fourteen years.”

“And where are you from Rey Johnson?” the interviewer asked, a kind smile for the girl.

“I’ve spent my whole life right her in Los Angeles.”

“And your parents? Are they proud that you’ve made it into So You Think You Can Dance?”

Rey’s smile dimmed slightly, a little more forced, a lot more sad. “I don’t know. I was, uh,” she swallowed thickly, trying to blink away the film of tears that suddenly clouded her eyes. “I was put up for adoption at four. I don’t know where my parents are or if they are proud of me.”

Looking up at the sympathetic stars of the interviewer and camera crew, she gave them a dazzling smile as she shrugged as if you say ‘y’win some, y’lose some.’

* * *

“No, _cradle_ her," Maz, their coach, admonished as she circled them like a hawk looking for every little weakness and flaw. "She's a woman, not a slab of uncooked liver.”

Kylo and Rey broke apart panting.

“He’d probably get along better with the liver,” Rey growled under her breath storming to the side to suck angerly from her water bottle.

Maz set her coke bottle lens gaze on her. “When I require your input I will ask for it.” Rey flushed guilty, looking away. “Now, again.”

It was their second session with Maz, the four-foot-nothing world renowned choreographer, and they were still learning only the first half of their performance. Rey set down her water coming to the center of the room again. Kylo shot her a dark glare, as if it was her fault their routine wasn’t falling in place.

She rolled her eyes at him, as the saying went, it took two to tango, and turned so that their backs were facing each other. The music started and Rey forgot about her partner's bad attitude to focus on keeping her beats.

She would have loved to lose herself in the music like she typically did when dancing a piece for herself but everything seemed to be different when dancing with somebody else. One had to be constantly aware of a partner's movements, when and where they were relative to oneself. Not to mention hip hop was not a style Rey knew much about so she was all too willing to put herself under Maz’s guidance.

They were still awkward in their movements. He acted as if he didn’t want to touch her, like she would dirty his perfect dance form with her mis-mash of technical understanding. It was annoying and insulting but she was a professional (well, was going to be a professional) and she would work with Grouchy McGrouchy-Face and get through the next six weeks, then they could switch partners.

* * *

Day five saw them all with short tempers. There were two days away from their first live show and they had just gotten to the second half of the routine late yesterday. Rey herself was running on three hours of sleep, having spent over half the night tossing and turning trying to ignore the unwanted feelings that having Kylo’s hand on her chest had created.

It wasn’t that he had been inappropriate. It was part of the routine and he in no way tried to use the choreography to cop a feel but Rey hadn't been prepared for the… intimacy of it. Another unknown side effect of having a dance partner it would seem.

As it was, she found herself blushing ever time she would catch his eye. It was becoming ridiculous and making her clumsy, something she rarely was after she had taken up dance. When she kicked the prop suitcase into his legs, she knew she’d messed up.

“What the fuck is your problem?" He blew up at her. "Are you trying to maime me with your poor dancing?”

“Kylo!” Maz barked.

“No!” Rey gasped. As much of a prick that he was, she didn’t want him to believe that of her. “I’m sorry, it was an accident.”

“An accident? You’ve been a train wreck all day.” He ran a hand through his hair, pulling on it, a trait Rey had come to see he did when he was in the midst of one of his tantrums. Only this time, it seemed like Rey herself would be the focus of his outburst. “God, I can’t believe you even got in, a little nobody with hardly any talent to her name. You are bringing down whatever prestige this show could lay claim on and it’s not like it has any to spare to begin with.”

“I, I--” She had lost the ability to speak. Tears pooled in her eyes and broke over. His words hit like perfectly aimed knives and tore up the self confidence she had slowly been pulling together over the years; that she was worth something, that, even in some small way, she mattered. On a sob she turned, and fled the room.

The diminutive, old enough to be a grandmother’s mother, woman turned on the towering young man with a glare that caused him to flinch back. “Just because you’ve gone to that prestigious Snoke’s Ballet Academy, gives you no right to treat that very talented girl that way, Ben.”

He turned shocked eyes to her and she tutted in disgust. “Just because I don’t dance anymore doesn’t mean I don’t keep my thumb on the pulse of the dance community, even the ones far from home. And you haven’t changed that much even if you’ve taken to dying your hair.”

“I don’t care why you are here or why you’ve chosen a separate identity. But hear me well, Ben Solo, if you belittle or make to feel worthless Rey or any of the other dancers in this competition, you are done. Do you hear me?”

Kylo nodded tightly.

“Good.” The eagle-eyed, grandmotherly persona fell back into place, “and, dear gods, my boy, breathe some life into your performance. You dance as if made of marble.”

“There is no point in dancing if the lines aren’t perfect,” he recited before he could think better of it.

Something akin to pity flashed behind Maz’s glasses, there and gone just as quickly. “My dear boy, that is the _very_ point. Use your knees and ankles as they should, or one day you won't have them.”

* * *

A stage hand came up on Rey, who was trying to get her nerves under control, covering the large headset to whisper, “we’re at commercial. You guys are on in ten.”

Rey nodded as the stage hand moved off, her nerves skyrocketing.

“If you vomit,” Kylo said in a non carrying voice and he stepped up beside her cinching his tie, “aim away from me.”

“Aren’t you nervous?” she squeaked, annoyed at his unruffled outer appearance.

He looked down from the corner of his eye at her as a costumer helped him into his suit jacket. “No.”

She rolled her eyes exasperated. After her break down the day before they hadn’t really talked. Once she had gotten control over herself and freshened up Rey made it back to the studio and apologised profusely to Maz about her behavior.

Maz had looked her over, nodded once, and shoved them back into learning the dance. Kylo had been … not nice but not his usual dickish self. Rey took it as his way of trying to make her feel better by not making her feel worse. She was just grateful they both seemed willing forget the whole incident. And they had finished learning the second half and were able to spend the whole sixth day nailing down all the details.

And yet here she was worrying about everything with, she checked the digital clock projected on the wall, less than a minute until their turn.  

She needed to breath. She needed to calm down. She needed to...

“You’re on,” the Tech ushered them onstage.

[Bleeding Love Dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vj6Uu6d6Ca0)

* * *

Rey stood panting in front of the judges feeling raw and oddly exposed. When Kylo had walked away from her in the dance, it had taken everything in her to not turn and run after him and she was still reeling from it.

The crowded had erupted in cheers though, so she took that as a good sign, and hopefully that would mean the judges wouldn't be harsh.

“Let me start off by saying what a gorgeous piece of choreography that was and you both brought so much emotion to it. Rey, the longing in your eyes there at the end I could tell how much strength it took to let him leave. And Kylo, your forms were strong, very ridged as if you were holding yourself back from staying with her. That was all very great.

“Now for the criticism. Rey, your hits. One the softer ones you got away with not going full out but when the routine called for it you just weren’t able to hit those stronger ones, the ones that would have really benefited from the extra power.

“Kylo, I’m going to give you a bit of mix signals, but I think you can handle it. You were too rigid. This was something I was worried about during boot camp and the fantastic Maz has woven up that shortcoming in the fabric of this routine where sharp lines and hard hits stand out. But the softer parts, like when you were holding her and shuffling across the floor, it just wasn’t believable. Fix that and you might just be the one to beat in this competition.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are greatly appreciated. Constructive criticisms welcome. Let me know what you think :)


	2. Hurts Like Hell

Rey’s phone went off at eight am. Still groggy, she blinked blearily at her cell until it stopped buzzing before turning over and burying herself under the blankets.

The show had finished its taping at ten the previous night. After the Director’s rundown, de-costuming and the shuttle ride back to the hotel it was well after eleven-thirty when Rey stumbled into her room, completely drained but too jazzed to sleep. After a long, hot shower she pulled on a pair of underwear and fell into bed as her mind kept playing over every centimeter of their performance until she dozed off somewhere close to one.

Her phone went off again, the soft chimes almost soothing. Her eyes fluttered closed, mind slipping into a gentle routine with slow dream like movements. Kylo was there and he was smiling...

The room’s phone rang, the landline much more shrill than the musical notes that was her ringtone, shocking her back awake. She debated ignoring it, still both mentally and physically exhausted from last night, but it was so damn _loud_. With a groan she pushed herself from bed, hissing at the tightness in her neck and shoulders, to shuffle across the room to answer it.

“Hello?” she croaked, rubbing her eyes.

It was Maz. “Fifteen minutes. The studio. I have food.”

The line died and Rey stared dumbfounded at the tan receiver before gently setting it back on the cradle. With profound longing she glanced at her bed and on a long sigh she tottered off to her closest to get clothed.

Today was going to be a long day.

* * *

 “You’re late,” Kylo barked the second she walked through the door. He had his hands on his hips and seemed to have just been pacing.

Too tired to get into it with him quite yet, she dumped her pack and water in her customary place against the wall.

“There’s coffee on the table,” Maz said from her stool in the corner, not bothering to look up. She sat crossed legged on her chair, a thick binder open in her lap and a pencil behind her ear as she shuffled though the pages pausing every so often to jot down a note. “The basket has muffins, blueberry and banana nut. After you eat, begin stretching.”

Stumbling across the room, eyes still wanting to shut, she closed in on the table as if it held the very answers to life.

Kylo moved with her, much more fluid in movement, still clearly itching for a fight. Well, she’d gotten two days of him not being a complete ass hat, he was bound to crack eventually as his personally was not what Rey would call ‘chill’.

“Maz called your cell, why didn’t you answer? Do you know how important my time is?” he snarled.

She glared up at him as she pulled a paper cup from the small stack to fill with the nectar of the gods and was about to lay into him when she noticed the dark circles under his eyes and the tightness around his lips. She sighed. He was just as tired as she was, and while that didn’t excuse his behavior, cutting him down just wouldn’t be worth it. Instead she filled the eight ounce cup with coffee, dumped his usual four sugar cubes in, gave it a quick stir and held it out to him.

“I don’t need--” he began in an indignant huff but Rey held a finger to her lips with her free hand in a shushing motion before pointing to the window in the corner shoving the cup into his hands.

Turning, she ignored him completely as she set about to making her own cup. He seemed to get the hint as he and his coffee ambled off into the pocket of sunlight she had pointed out.

She took a long pull from her coffee and moaned in pleasure. One would think after how much coffee she drank trying to keep up with two jobs and school Rey would hate the taste, but she still loved it. Providing she could doctor it to her precise standards.

Filling the newly empty space with more cream she grabbed a stack of napkins, placed four muffins on them, and wrapped it up like a sack. Walking to the window she fell in a heap to the ground, back to the window, as she arranged her goods. Shaking a napkin free she set one of the blueberries muffins on it and pushed it an arm’s length in Kylo’s direction, who stood brooding against the wall; arms folded, the rim of his cup pressed against his lips as he continued to glare at her.

“I don’t want--” he started but again Ray lifted a finger to her lips. Choosing not to acknowledge him further in favor of her food she broke a banana nut muffin in half, dunking one side into her coffee and biting into the soggy mass.

She felt his eyes on her and a small tingle ran up her spine.

“That’s disgusting.”

She hid her smile in a big slurp of coffee and shrugged, shoving another bit into her mouth.

Several minute past before he sighed and gracefully lowered himself to the floor a few feet from her. Stretching he picked up the offered muffin and nibbled at it in a much more elegant manor then her.

* * *

Twenty minutes later Kylo had moved hard core into his floor exercise routine.

Rey did some light stretching, still nursing her second coffee, as she watched him burn through a hundred push-ups like they were nothing. The perfectly controlled up and down movement, coupled with the light sheen of sweat defining his muscles, was mesmerizing.

So, when Maz got up from her perch and slammed her binder on the ground between them, Rey jumped.

“This is what we are doing next,” Maz informed standing over them, hands on hips.

Kylo sat up, his breathing barely elevated as he turned the packet towards himself. Rey leaned over to see, ignoring the clean bite of his sweat. It was a storyboard.

Maz went on explaining, “a continuation, if you will, from what happened after Kylo’s character walked off stage last night. We are going into Rey’s character and how she’s feeling on the inside. Ready to begin?“

“Of course,” Kylo stood, immediately ready.

Rey was still skimming through the book with a frown. “These seem like a lot of contemporary moves. Shouldn’t we wait until we see what dance we’re going to pick?”

Maz shared a look with Kylo before turning to Rey. “This is a competition, yes, but first it’s a game show. I have the list of all your dance types until you guy split after week six.”

Rey blinked up at her. “I don’t understand. Why would they make such a big deal about us opening the envelopes?”

“It makes for good entertainment,” Kylo sighed as if she was insufferable in her naivete.

“Well, excuse me for not being a world weary cynic at the ripe old age of twenty-four,” Rey growled gathering up their discarded napkins and marching to the corner to throw them away.

Kylo snorted nastily. “Don’t delude yourself into thinking the world will be rainbows, kittens and butterflies just because you want it that way. You, me, we’re all out for ourselves, same as everybody else. You’re just as willing to step on anther person before they can step on you.”

Rey turned on him with a snarl. “You don’t know the first thing about--”

“ENOUGH!” Maz roared. “I don’t have the patience to hear you both bicker all day. I have somewhere to be at three-thirty so we have five hours to get this blocked out. Keep your personal opinions to yourself and focus on the dance, capiche?”

* * *

 “Why is he always the one leaving me?” Rey asked towards the end of day three to the room at large. She was laying in the middle of the room on the floor staring at the ceiling as she panted after a full run through of the routine. Kylo, in typical Kylo fashion, had moved off to the side and was doing perfectly executed squats in the corner. It was almost like he punished himself by never taking breaks.

“Hum?” Maz grunted from her little corner where she was furiously working on something. Next week’s storyboards no doubt.

Rey tuned on her stomach to stretch, making some concession in the name of not tightening up. “Well, this dance and the last one had the guy walking away. I know he has his own issues going on but,” she folded her arms under her chin as she wondered aloud, “is there something about me that says I’m easy to leave?”

She felt the air go unnaturally still and glanced up. Both Maz and Kylo were looking at her.

“No, Rey,” Maz said with quiet conviction, “there is nothing about you that says you’d be easy to leave.”

Rey sat up, feeling strangely vulnerable under their gaze. “It’s just, if this is supposed to be in my head like you said it was, I would dream up him staying. Why would I want to relive him leaving me again?”

Maz got a far away look in her eye. “You’re… right.”

Turning back to her desk she shuffled through her papers muttering to herself, “‘why’ indeed. How did I not see that.” Louder she continued, “We’re done for today. I have to fix something in the routine. Be here at eight sharp tomorrow.”

Gathering a large stack of pages she dropped them into the wastebasket with a resounding thud.

* * *

 Maz blew into the studio at three minutes after the hour, shoving a packet into Kylo and one into Rey’s hands as she stormed past to set her bags on her desk. “I’ve changed as much as I could but I don’t have time to change the entire routine so we’re going to have to make it work. With new lighting and some costume alteration, the loose threads should tie themselves up.”

“It doesn’t look like all that much has changed,” Rey soothed, relieved herself things weren't more different. “Just this little bit at the beginning seems tighter and you added these last couple moves at the end.”

Kylo was studying his own packet a dark frown marring his face. “But that changes everything! It's shifted the focus from you and places it one me.” He scrubbed though the packet growing angrier by the page turn. “By walking away now, you’ve made me a coward!”

“How about you dance the piece first before you condemn it,” Maz sniffed.

“Come on, Kylo, let’s just try it,” Rey conjoled. “Who knows, you might like it.”

“I doubt it,” he snapped. Her face fell and he relented. “Fine. We’ll try it.”

“Lets get started then,” Maz said.

They both sat on the ground facing one another as Maz circled them.

“No music?” Rey questioned as she settled.

“Not yet. I need to see if the song still works with these fixes.” Maz said distracted as she straightened Rey’s neck so she was back to facing forward. “I want you to mirror each other here. We are no longer piling all the emotional struggle on Rey and labeling a one sided crush a ‘heartbreak’, now we’re making you both fully realized people with a full range of human emotions.” Maz’s voice echoed around them as they moved, taking on the place of the music explaining the new story as it unfolded. “Two lonely individuals building each other up, finding common ground to stand on.”

“Now instead of letting each other go and you leaving again,” Maz instructed Kylo, “I want you to allow Rey to lay you on the ground, your not as in control as you are used to being. Now Rey, you’re keeping with the original next piece of choreography, reaching for him, trying to call him back.

“Step back, Kylo put your feet on her butt and lift. No, relax. No need to flail. Kylo may be many things, but we both know he’s got the legs to hold you up. And back down. Good.”

“Why are you the one concerned?” Kylo grunted beneath her as he lowered her. “You’re not the person who’ll end up with a knee in the nuts if things go wrong.” He tossed and helped her through her spin. She had her arms out to brace herself but he caught her effortlessly.

She grinned down at him, lowering her arms to take her weight off him, “poor baby. Suddenly all my concerns about falling have magically slipped way.”

“And you worm away not ready for the commitment in her eyes...” Maz voice faded to the background as Kylo stared up at Rey.

Her smile was luminescent. He reached brushing the strands of hair that had come loose from her bun out of her eyes, overcome with the need to see her entire face clearly.

He watched as it pinched slightly into a look of confusion. “Kylo?”

“Yes?”

“It’s your move.” She shifted her weight on her arms. “I’m not sure how much longer I can hold myself like this.”

He blinked. “Right,” he said sliding himself out from under her and hopping to his feet.

She sat back on her heels looking up at him. “Are you alright?”

“Fine,” he snapped, running his hands through his hair. “I’m just not sure I like this version. We almost had the other one down. Are you sure we can make the corrections in time?” He questioned Maz who gazed at him behind her glasses with an unreadable expression. He flushed looking away.

“I know I’m the hold up in this partnership,” Rey piped in from the floor with a wry smile, “but I think I can do it. Besides, I like this one so much better.”

He glared down at her. “You would.”

She shrugged, not put off by his sour mood. “It feels more real. I know from experience that it's not the heartbreak that gets you, it’s the misplaced hope. I side with your character, sometimes it's easier to just walk away and not chance getting hurt.”

He felt his heart shutter. “And you call me a pessimist.”

“No,” Rey said standing and dusting herself off. “I called you a cynic, there's a difference. And _I’m_ not a pessimist. _I_ believe that just because the world can be a messed up place sometimes, doesn’t mean we need to compound it by acting mean.”

He turned away from her, not wanting to get in a philosophical debate with her right now, to demand from Maz, “so are we really going to keep with this new ad-lib?”

“It won’t be ad-lib after we run through it a few hundred times,” Rey sang sweetly

He glared over his shoulder at her, “you understand my point, don’t be obtuse.”

“Fine,” she huffed with an eye roll, “we’ll put it to a vote. All those in favor of keeping with the original raise your hand.”

“What are we, in kindergarten?” Kylo groused.

“Just do it.”

He rolled his eyes and put his hand up.

“Now those in favor of using this new, improved, better in every way, routine; raise your hand.” Her hand sprang up in the air.

“With just the two of us this doesn’t make--” he cut off when Maz raised her hand.

“Yay,” Rey cheered, bending down to give the much shorter woman a hug, “we’re keeping the new one.”

“That's not fair. She’s not the one going to be dancing, her vote doesn’t count.”

Rey turned on him, "she's the choreographer, of course her vote counts. Your just mad you didn’t win.

“I’m not mad,” he enunciated carefully, “I just feel our time would be better suited --”

“Nu-uh. You can learn this new routine in your sleep and I’m willing to try and learn it because it's so much better. So get with the times, grandpa, majority rules and we’re keeping it.”

“Females,” he huffed, rolling his eyes.

Rey ignored him, asking Maz, “can we work on that end bit some more. I don’t want to look like a wounded duck when I’m trying to be a graceful angel.”

* * *

 

[Dance ](https://youtu.be/qk00gbDwGqM?t=6) -- time stamp 6 seconds  
[Song](https://youtu.be/JMoBCXlk9kc?t=94) -- time stamp 1:34.   
Directions: (not sure how this will work on mobile) set up 'dance' in one tab and mute. Then in new tab, set up 'song'. Hit play on 'song' then QUICKLY switch to 'Dance' tap and hit play. Let me know what you think :)

* * *

 They had been on fire!

Maz had taken Kylo off to the side before they went into costuming and whatever she’d said to him that had made him off putting for most of the night had made his performance ten times better then how they’d been practicing.

When he’d reached up to her at the end, an add in that Maz had kept from that first run through, there had been something in his eyes that made her heart beat faster. Or maybe it was the air on stage. Everything seemed to crackle with energy. 

Either way it had been perfect and Rey was very proud of herself as she stood with her arms around Kylo, a smile from ear to ear, in front of the judges. She knew there were going to be critiques, and there were; Kylo was still a little too rigid for the judges and she needed to remember to point her feet more but over all they did great.


	3. Addicted to Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sings off key* theSe sTOrieS JusT KEep GetTIng aWay fROm ME
> 
> Thank you fangirlFiona for your comment! I'm glad you like it!

 

When Rey had woken up that morning to head into the studio she had in no way considered that she would have been asked to jump off an office desk into Kylo’s arms. Yet that was exactly what was being demanded of her.

“Rey you need to relax. This should look fluid and graceful, not like you're scared he’s going to drop you at every turn. His job is to keep you up, your job is to make it look good,” Maz stood off to the side with her hands on her hips.

Standing on the ground, head in line with her navel, Kylo rolled his eyes, “I don’t see what the issue is, we’ve done lifts before.”

“Yeah, _you_ lifting _me_ , not me _falling_ on you.” Rey glared down at him from her added height of the table.

“For fucks sake, just fall already,” Kylo growled exasperated.

“If you drop me,” she let her threat peter off as she eyed the ground and re-thought angering what in essence would be the only thing that would keep her from taking a long tumble.

“Why would I drop you?” he demanded, arms still raised to catch her. “I’m stuck with you for another four weeks. It’s not like I need to make things harder on myself by having to carry you more than I already do.”

“You’re such a dick weed,” she huffed under her breath.

“Yes, I am. Now fall.”

What was her issue? With Kylo’s height her fall would be a foot, _maybe_ two. She’d done more then that falling into bed some nights. And even if he missed her it wasn’t like the ground was all that far, the desk being two and a half feet tall.

Rey had almost psyched herself up enough to chance it but at the last second her body just refused to tip her over the edge. She might only be two feet higher than normal but that was still almost eight feet for her head to fall before it hit the ground. What if he didn’t catch her? Or what if she slipped and wasn’t able to correct in time. What if--

“Rey!” She blinked breaking out of her tunnel vision on the floor to lock eyes with Kylo. His brown eyes were so calm and sure. “Trust me, I’ve got you. Now, on three.”

Rey nodded, swallowing.

He kept his eyes on her, keeping her grounded in the now instead of worrying over all the possible outcomes. “One...two…”

With a squeal she fell forward, eyes wanting to close but Rey kept them open just in case she needed to make any last second saves.

Not that there was a need. Kylo caught her neatly, cradling her easily to his chest. She felt herself sagging with relief in his hold.

“Very good,” Maz said dryly from her stool. “Now, if we can get you do to that with a bit more grace and less the look of a toppling board, you might just make it through this round. The competition is ramping up, that means we’re going to need to as well. There are going to be a lot more throws and jumps and catches. You better prepare yourself for that.”

“This is just the first time I’ve done a trust fall from five feet in the air. I’ll do better in the future.” She glanced up at Kylo, who still held her in his arms, a slight frown on his face as he looked at her. “You can put me--”

“Have you lost weight?” he interrupted.

She blinked in surprise at the change of gears. Smiling awkwardly, she patted him on the chest, “you flatterer, you.”

“I’m not saying it to be flattering,” he articulated. “You need to remain at a near constant size so I can calculate how much force I need to manipulate you on the dance floor. If you’re too light I could end up throwing you too hard and hurting myself. Or you.” He hefted her in his arms, “you’re at least a pound lighter then you were last week.”

“Okay, I am not having this conversation in your arms,” she squirmed until he set her down.

“What have you been eating?” he questioned curtly.

“I don’t know, whatever they serve here in the cafeteria,” she said as she circled around him to climb back up on the desk.

“You actually eat the food here?” He looked disgusted.

“It’s free and it’s filling. That’s all I care about.” She stuck her hands on her hips standing above him, “I am done with this conversation. So, are we going to dance or what?”

He rolled his eyes but was there to catch her when she fell.

* * *

 “Here.”

A green notebook was lowered into her line of focus as she crouched over her duffel, shoving things away.

Rey accepted the book, “what’s this?”

“A food journal. For you can keep track of what you eat so you can make sure you’re getting the proper nutrients.”

“Oh,” she said both oddly touched and slightly annoyed that he was still harping on the issue. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” He ran a hand through his hair, making minimal eye contact, “I was also wondering if you wanted to get dinner. With me. Tonight.”

She raised a brow as she hooked the strap of her bag over her shoulder and stood. “You wouldn’t be trying to fatten me up, would you?”

“No,” he said quickly. “I just thought it would be … nice.”

They had been in each other’s company nearly constantly over the last two weeks but this was the first time that he had made any overtures at wanting to spend time with her outside the confines of the dance floor. She was instantly suspicious.

“I’m not really up for going out--”

“We can get delivery,” he interjected, scrambling to thing of something they could order in, “uh, Piz...za?”

She grinned at his not so subtle workaround. But he was making a sorta effort, and he was almost … charming in his concern for her well being. It was… nice.

“Sure, pizza works.” Her bank account could withstand the expense of a pizza, especially half a pizza, now that her room and board were covered for as long as she was in the competition. “Pineapple?”

He grimaced. “Heathen.”

She smiled beguiling, “half?”

He let out a long put upon sigh, “fine.”

“Great. Six good for you? I have a few things to do after practice.”

He nodded victoriously. “That will be fine.”

* * *

 “It’s open,” Rey called out, not bothering to look up from her mountain of homework at the knock at her door.

“ _Why_ is it open?”

Rey’s head shot up to see Kylo standing in her doorway. Dark jeans, a white t-shirt and a black leather jacket making him look like bad-boy incarnate.

Her eyes immediately swiveling to the digital clock on the nightstand. Where had the time gone? After a long shower and pulling on her most comfortable pair of pajamas she had buried herself into her textbooks and hadn't come up for air since. She had meant to dress up a bit, nothing flashy, but something that didn’t have Eeyore plastered all over it and both pants cuffs still intact.

“Rey,” he demanded, still hovering at the threshold, “why isn’t your door locked.”

“I just leave it unlocked when I’m here,” she answered as she stood, trying not to fidget as she went to usher him in. “You can come in, you know.”

“Do you know how many burglaries happen in LA alone?” he harped as she pulled him in, allowing her to step around him to close the door.

“I think something like sixteen thousand. But there’s a doorman out front, so it’s not like randoms can walk off the street. And I’m pretty sure none of the people here want my 4th edition textbooks.” He glared. She rolled her eyes and flipped the deadbolt. “Happy?”

He huffed, neglecting to answer as he strode into the room.

“I brought beer,” he said holding up a six pack of something foreign along with the pizza. “If I’m doing a cheat day, I’m doing it right. You want one?”

Rey shook her head, following him back into the room, “I’m nineteen.”

“Oh, right,” he recalled as he popped off one of the caps with the handle of a fork she had left in the drying rack on small kitchenette counter, “things are different in the states.”

“You’ve been out of the country?” she questioned as she brought down two plates from the cabinet refusing to feel awkward with him being so close when they had literally already been plastered all over each other for the last two weeks.

“Yeah,” he took a long pull from his bottle. “At six-- uh-- eighteen I moved to Russia for a few years.”

“How was that?” She immediately started to serve the pizza, not realizing just how hungry she had gotten studying. A slice for herself to start and two for him.

“Cold,” he said as he snagged the plate with the single slice bracing himself against the counter to eat.

She rolled her eyes but nonetheless took the double plate portion, ripping off paper towels for herself and handing one to Kylo.

“After three years you have to have something better then ‘cold’ to say about it,” she said around a mouth full of pizza as she and her plate plonked themselves on the floor so her back could rest against the bed.

He shrugged, picking off the pieces of pineapple. Rey held up her plate to him, hating to waste food, and he wordlessly transferred the undesired fruit onto it.

“I’m assuming you went there to study ballet,” she asked popping a few of the loose pineapple in her mouth and chewing. “How was that?”

“It was,” he got a far away look in his eyes as he absently wiped his fingers on his napkin before grabbing his beer. “It was hard. Only twelve boys-- men-- were allowed in the program at any given time. If you didn’t do well enough, you were cut. If you didn’t do as you were told, you were cut. If weren’t willing to sacrifice everything to be the best, you were cut. And there were always others that were willing to take your place.”

Rey tried to imagine herself in that environment and couldn’t. It sounded so ruthless. But, she guessed that did explain a lot about Kylo. His focused drive, his demand for perfection from her and their routine, his inability to takes breaks. It made him a fantastic dancer but Rey found herself wondering what little boy Kylo was like. If there was something besides dance that he had enjoyed before dance had taken over his life.

“What about you?” he asked, breaking her out of her thoughts of what he would look like if he smiled.

“What about me, what?”

“How does a no name with mediocre technical understanding of dance find herself in a reality dance competition.”

She was thrown by the cutting remark after they had been so civil but strived to keep her hurt hidden. “I’m going to take that as the complement you undoubtedly meant it as,” she said standing. “But to answer your question, she loses her job.”

He blinked. “What?”

“Two jobs, actually,” she said, nudging him out of the way of the sink so she could begin to wash her plate, keeping her eyes down and focused on her task, “and her apartment.

“The first one was at a corner store that I’d been at for almost two years. The owner was an elderly woman and decided to sell to her nephew who almost immediately started using it as a front for drugs. He wasn’t really good at it. The police busted him about three weeks in and the building was shut down. At the second one my now ex-roommate, who I helped get the job she got me fired from, bad mouthed me to the boss about what went down at my first job.

“So, within about three days I was unemployed and homeless. I didn’t really have anything else to lose so I decided to spend almost fourteen hours standing in line to audition. And I got through.” She turned to him holding out her hand to take his plate, “you done?”

He handed over his plate. “I’m ... sorry,” he said after a long minute.

She shrugged, intent on scrubbing the bit of coagulated cheese from his plate. “It is what it is.”

“No,” he caught her hand and turned her so she could look in his eyes at his sincerity. “Whatever you lack in technique you more then make up for in sheer stage presence and your tenacity for honing your craft. You have grown much more than I thought was possible in this competition and I am sorry for trying to belittle that. You dance beautifully.”

She was shocked speechless for a moment so the first things that came to her mind was something to ease the sudden emotional tension. “Now there’s a compliment.”

He huffed a chuckle glancing away and Rey breathed a sigh of relief as the air calmed.

“I do actually know what those are,” he said running a hand through his hair, “I’m just not used to giving them.” He looked back at her, his eyes serious once again, “I’m not used to having friends to give them to.”

Her breath caught again. “Is that what we are, friends?”

He hesitated, just like he did at the door, but this time he took that final step all on his own. “I would like to be.”  

She smiled, feeling a warm rush in her chest. “Okay.”

* * *

 The next morning she tossed him a filled zip lock baggie.

He caught it deftly, barely glancing at it as he sipped his coffee. “What’s this?”

“Don’t tell me you’ve never seen cold, day-after, gym bag pizza before?”

He studied the squished slices, with a raised brow, “looks appetizing.”

She smiled and shrugged turning to put her stuff down. “You buy half, you eat half. The rules of communal eating.”

“Half?” he questioned.

“Yeah, half,” Rey said walking over to turn the baggy around to show the twenty taped to the plastic. “Must have been the baggy fairy, come to pay you back. ”

He squinted down at her, “you’re very odd.”

She grinned. “Yep.”

His head came down and his voice lowered as if sharing a secret with her. “You know you don’t have to pay me back, right?”

“I know. But I need to.” her eye’s were insistent as she held out the baggy again.

He sighed, knowing there would be no arguing with her over what she deemed her ‘half’ and tossed the pizza onto his gym bag in the corner.

* * *

“Rey, dear, I’m going to need you to be more sexy,” Maz said as they broke apart for a quick break.

“I can be more sexy,” Rey assured, breathing heavily as she sipped from her water bottle.

Kylo snorted from his own corner.

“What’s so funny,” Rey turned to mock glare at him across the room.

He gave her body a once over before locking eyes with her, a slight curl to his lips. “Eeyore.”

She flushed. He had paid her attire such little attention last night she’d thought he hadn't even noticed. “You know what, give me my pizza back.”

The curl turned into a full blown grin and Rey was almost knocked over backwards. “Nu-uh, you took the pineapple off. Its mine.”

“That’s it,” Rey growled once she could form words from her dry mouth. “We’re running this again. Right now.”

He stalked forward, eyes amused “Lets. I wanna see what you consider ‘more sexy.’”

* * *

 “You’re going to need to point your toes or something or this isn’t going to work,” he growled frustrated as he tried to hold her up, reach behind him, and take off her shoe at the same time.

“This wouldn’t be so difficult if you weren't as tall,” she snipped, face flaming as she tried to balance on one foot with the other one tossed over his shoulder. “I feel like a monkey trying to climb a tree.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m use to having woman’s legs wrapped around me.”

Her jaw fell open as he looked up at him. “Is that a dancers joke?”

“Maybe,” he grinned. “Ah-ha, got it.” He presented her with her shoe allowing her leg to drop.

She accepted the shoe, hiking back to sit at the edge of the desk. “There has to be an easier way to do this. Maybe if I don’t wear the heels?”

“The shoes are an important element to the dance,” Maz intoned from her corner. “This is a man’s dream about his partner. Taking the red shoe off is them releasing their desire and then the dance begins. The shoe stays.”

“Fine,” Rey sighed, slipping the red pumps back on, looking at Kylo. “Ready for round seventeen?”

* * *

 Rey stood in the shadows on stage watching the back of Kylo’s head and all of the sudden Maz’s final instructions clicked. “Turn the sexy up to ten.”

Rey was going to make this dream one nobody was going to forget.

[Addicted to Love Dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Cz0lsh2mUk)

“You guys have grown tremendously as a couple this week. Your trust in each other, the effortlessness in which you dance. Kylo when you lifted her there, right after you took off her shoe, was breathtaking. You've always had the raw power but there, that gentleness when your eyes connected, that is what we’re looking for. That tempered strength. Truly beautiful to watch.

“And Rey, your elegance and grace, you were gorgeous up there this evening in that red dress. Together you made those tosses and jumps look elementary even though I know they are not. This is a very memorable dance. Congratulations.”

Rey didn’t think her smile could get any bigger but with Nigel’s next words it all came crashing down.

“Unfortunately, last week, America did not vote for your dance and you are in the bottom three. I look forward to your solo’s.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments. Please, comments. I love hearing from you. Tell me what you liked, tell me what you didn't like, what I can do better on. 
> 
> Are the links working? Are what do you guys think of the inbedded videos? Do they make since or are they too much? For those of you on mobile, how do they work there? 
> 
> General gushing or candid reviews/breakdowns are supper appreciated!!!!
> 
> ps: any taggs you think would fit this story for me to add.


	4. I Can't Make You Love Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to the 'guest' that left a comment. 
> 
> Let me know what you guys think, good or bad.

Rey stood in the wings of the stage, alone, staring at her hands. They were shaking.

This could be it, the end of her journey on ‘So You Think You Can Dance.’ All the effort everyone had put in to get her to this point completely wasted.

A hand touched her arm. She turned exspecting Kylo who had disappeared as soon as they left stage but it was Maz looking up at her with a no nonsense expression.

All of Rey’s anxieties bubbled forth. “This is all my fault. We should have never changed the choreography so late in the week. I’m so sorry for--”

“Hush,” Maz commanded as she took Rey’s hands in her own, squeezing them tightly to stop their trembling. “We can not change the past, nor would I want to. Very rarely do I meet a dancer that makes me rethink my choreography but you did and made the dance all the better for it. Just because you are in the bottom three does not make you any less worthy of being here. You are a great dancer, believe that.”

Rey nodded, Maz’s faith in her making her tear up in gratitude.

A stage hand called over the bustle of backstage, “all solo contestants on stage. One minute til commercial end. Again, one minute to we’re back on.”

“Now go out on that stage and show them how much you’ve grown and how much you deserve to be here.  And don’t forget,” Maz chucked her under the chin, smiling kindly, “point your toes. They will be looking at that, yeah? No matter what happens, I will see you tomorrow.”

Kylo was first, his solo full of the power and technique he was known for. [Kylo's Solo -first 30 sec](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dB5hYv0v1Fs)

Rey was fourth. Besides the thirty seconds where she lost herself in the music and her routine, she was a nervous mess. [Rey's Solo](https://youtu.be/30ebOk78duk?t=111)

After everyone’s solo the judges lined them up. There were four other extraordinary dances on stage with them and they were all fighting for their place just as hard as Kylo and she were but for somebody the journey ended here.

“Rey, step forward.” She felt her stomach fall, but did as she was asked. “With this routine you’ve shown you are willing to take our criticisms and use them to make yourself better. Your hits were hard and clean, your lines crisp. However, make sure not to lose your wonderful personality that we all love. You are a joy to watch and I can’t wait to see where else this competition takes you. You are safe. Please step back.”

“Kylo, step forward.” He stepped around her, head up, not once making eye contact as he took his stance in front of the judges. “Again another masterful display of technical might. But what is saving you right now is that flash of gentleness we saw in you routine tonight. We already know you’re a great dancer, Kylo, but you have a long way to grow and _that’s_ what we’re interested in seeing. Please step back, you are safe tonight.”

Nigul moved down the line to the next dancer, “Kira--”

Rey tried to smile at her partner as he stepped back into line but again he ignored her.

They stood on stage as they learned who would be leaving the show but Rey was completely focused on what felt like a wall of ice growing between them. They had made it through in the competition but with Kylo’s disregard she felt as if she lost something.

* * *

“What’s wrong with you today? Did getting in the bottom three make you lose your edge?” He joked as he guided her through a less than perfect spin.

“No, it wasn’t that,” she said quietly, stepping through the next bit of choreography. She had spent hours tossing and turning feeling immense amount of guilt, debating ways to say she was sorry for getting them in the bottom three.

When she had walked in the studio he hadn’t seemed at all like the Kylo from last night, he was down right chipper. That’s when her guilt had turned to annoyance and throughout the day was slowly bubbling into anger.

He caught her arm as, per the routine, it came back to strike at him, halting the dance. “Then what is it?”

“Nothing,” she bit, shaking her head. She looked away trying to pull her hand free. “Let’s just continue with the routine.”

“Rey,” he said softly, an insistent question in his voice, still keeping her tied to him.

“You just walked away.” She hated how small her voice sounded.

He looked flabbergasted. “What?”

That angry bubble popped and she jerked away, standing and stomping across the room to put some distance between them. “You walked away and I don’t understand why.”

“Walked away when?” he demanded, gaining his feet as well.

“Last night. After we got in the bottom three.”

“What did you want me to do, hold your hand while we danced? We were competitors, Rey.”

“We are friends, Kylo, and you just ignored me.”

“I was standing behind you the rest of the night!”

“Look,” she said, staring hard at the ground, “I’m sorry I got us--”

“Nothing you did got us in the bottom three. Rey, this is a reality show where they sucker people out of their money to cast votes. I can probably find the numbers somewhere but I wouldn’t be surprised if we lost by a couple hundred votes or less.”

“They why were you so angry?”

“I not angry!” he snapped.

“I know when you're mad, Kylo," her own voice raised to match his. "And you wouldn’t even look at me last night!”

“That had nothing to do with you,” he enunciating each word through clenched teeth.

“Then why wont you tell me?” she demanded.

“Why are you still pressing! Leave it alone!” he roared into Rey’s startled face before turning and storming out the door.

Rey stood there for a long minute staring after Kylo, chest tight. Turning with a watery smile she informed Maz, “I guess we’re done for today.”

* * *

Feeling a little nostalgic after the abrupt end of practice, Rey stopped off at the cafeteria to pick up one of the pre-portion serving of cereal. She had half a quart of milk in her mini-fridge and didn’t feel up to making anything more substantial. To give herself something to do to stop wallowing she pulled out her textbooks and studied as she ate.

She finished the next two weeks of pending assignments and sat staring at the log-in page with nothing else to do. She tried surfing for a bit but started feeling restless. Even with eight plus hours a day of practice and the several hours of pre-record interviews each week, she wasn’t used to having all this down time.

Deciding her time would be put to better use she went down to the studio to begin working on a new solo. A good twenty minute warm up she tuned in a random playlist to the sound system and angled her cell’s camera towards the mirror so it could record the whole room before beginning.

Maz had shown her the benefits of having a recording of her sessions. It helped Rey pick out interesting bits of choreograph and to tighten up any issues with her form on the play back instead of having to micromanage it live. She was at her best creatively when her body just moved with the music.

She danced though a dozen songs, the music poppy and light, just getting into the flow of things. Then a song clicked on that was slow and somber, her mind turning to that weeks routine, which made her think of her dance partner and then their more recent fight.  

Kylo was a conundrum. One minute being friendly, grabbing a meal with her or showing her how to fill out the food journal he gave her. Then turning haunty when she made a comment that the way he marked down everything from proteins to sugar concentrate and Vitamin A, C and D levels down to the milligram, was a bit obsessive.

Besides the brooding, that had lessened as the weeks had gone on, she general found that she enjoyed his company. He was smart. Able to name drop the last three hundred years of classical composers and tell a piece's choreographer from a five second clip.

He was also a huge Tech-nerd. Chatting on about some new project Tesla was working on, the benefits of DIY computer kits instead of buying stock, and the pros/cons of water- vs solar-power if she showed even a hint of being interested. And she always was, she liked the sound of his voice when he was excited about something.  

He could be kind when he wanted to. He bought her a few really nice take-out meals and hadn't complained when she in turn served him something she’d prepared with the in-room microwave. He’d even complimented her on one. He seemed shocked he had enjoyed it but it was still a complement.

And, when he could get over himself, he could be funny. Like rolling-on-the-floor-holding-your-stomach funny.

Maybe that’s why she was so hurt by his vanishing act. She thought they were bonding and he goes and he pulls the rug out from under her. She had a sickening though that his attempt at friendship just a way to get a feel for his ‘competition’. If that turned out to be the case she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to compartmentalize and still dance effectively with him for the remaining three weeks they had together.

The next song started, another sad ballad. Not wanting to dwell on things she couldn’t change, she went to switch it back to something light. As she scrolled through the list of songs the studio’s door open. She looked up with a slight frown, it was bad manners to interrupt someone in-studio for anything less than a dire emergency

So of course it was Kylo.

His duffel was slung across his chest, hair was sweat dampened as was the collar of his black muscle shirt. He clearly just came from the full amenity in-hotel gym. She’s seen him in there a few times during her own sessions and, just like everything else he seemed to do, he went full tilt in his work out.

“As you can see,” she bit out as they stared at each other, “I’m using this room.” If he’d bothered to look through the glass window he’d have seen that. But no, he just barged in like he owned the place like he always did. “You can either come back or go find another one that's not occupyed.” She turned his back on him to continue to fiddle with her music hoping he’d go away.  

“Your lines are weak.” He pointed out.

Rey turned furious eyes on him and hissed through gritted teeth, “I’m practicing.”

He still stood in the doorway, one hand on the handle, holding it open. “There’s no sense of practicing if your not going to do it right.”

She looked down her noise at him, “I’m not in the mood for more of your--”

“Will you help me with my solo,” he interrupted, his face going unnaturally blank.

Her entire brain short-circuited and she just stood there, not quiet gawking at him, as it rebooted. There was no way she had heard him correctly. “What?”

“I would like your opinion on how to become less ... rigid.”

Still annoyed with his earlier behavior she almost turned him down out of turn but caught herself as she fully heard what he’d said. ‘Rigid’ was a term the judges threw around, a lot, when it came to him. Rey had assumed, with his blatant disregard for others opinions and he nearly conceited levels of self-esteem, that the criticism had gone in one ear and straight out the other if it even bother to make the detour at all.

Now she really looked at him. His hand gripped the strap of his gym back, then tendons standing out in sharp relief. The way he held the door was almost as if he used it as a shield. And his eyes; it was as if he was forcing himself to meet her gaze. It began to waver slightly the longer she looked at him but remained silent.

“Never mind,” he growled getting his dander up. “Forget I said--”

“Okay,” she said quietly before he could dig himself back into his superiority hole. “I’m not sure how I can help but … okay.”

* * *

Rey and Kylo stood talking as they gathered their things after their on-stage dress rehearsal when Rey’s eyes caught on a regal woman talking with one of the stagehands. From the back she reminded Rey of the mentor that had turned her onto dance when she was six. With no small about of guilt Rey thought she’d should get back in contact with the one person that had been a near constant in her life.

Then the stagehand pointed over the woman’s shoulder at both her and Kylo and Rey frowned in confusion until the woman turned.

“Leia?” Rey breathed, shocked, not even noticing that Kylo had frozen in place as she stepped around him.

“Rey,” the woman smiled fondly opening her arms wide as she walked towards them and Rey sailed into them wrapping her arms tight around her. “How have you been, my dear? I’ve missed seeing you at the shop.”

Rey looked down embarrassed. “Money's been tight.”

Leia clucked her under the chin, “you know you are always welcome.”

“I know,” she said guiltily as they pulled apart, “but I don’t like not paying my way.”

“You more then pay your way with how much you help me.”

“I just tinker a bit,” Rey dismissed with a shrug.

“I had to go buy a new computer because something shorted in R2. I tried to transfer my files off it but Geek Squad said everything was ‘antiquated’.”

“Oh, no! You didn’t throw it away, did you?” she begged the older woman.

“Of course not,” Leia soothed, brushing back some of the wisps that had broken free of Rey’s carefully made up hair. “You’re as attached to that hunk of computer parts as I am. I knew you’d be back sooner or later.”

“I’ll take a few hours off tomorrow and come--”

“No, no,” she admonished gently keeping an arm around the younger girl, “you keep up with what you’re doing here. It’s waited six months for you, it can wait a few more until you win.”

“I may not even win--”

“Oh, hush,” Leia interrupted.

Rey rolled her eyes with fond exasperation. “Leia, be realistic. There are so many wonderful dancers on the show. Everyone thinks Kylo-- oh, Kylo,” she remembered turning to look for him. He was standing in the shadows at the side of the stage, shoulders straight and arms clasped behind his back. She waved him over with a warm smile, “Kylo, come here, I want you to meet someone.”

He stalked forward as if coming to the executioner's block, angling to keep Rey between himself and Leia.

“Leia, my dance partner, Kylo Ren. Kylo, my dance teacher, Leia Organa-Solo.” Rey introduced.

“I thought you had not formal training,” his words were cold as he glared menacingly at the older woman.

“I don’t,” she said with a frown wondering why he was being so rude all of the sudden. It was like first week Kylo all over again. “Gene--”

“Gene?” he asked, his tone more natural as he looked questioningly down at her.

Bumping her shoulder against his chest as she smiled up at him, “first house I was fostered in. She got me dance lessons twice a month for almost a year.”

He brow pinched slightly, “and that was it?”

“Leia,” she favoring the woman with a bowed head and a smile, “was kind enough to let me continue to use the studio when I needed to work things out. We’ve remained friends.”

“How quaint,” he sneered disregarding Leia.

“Kylo,” she sighed. Turning to Leia with an apologetic smile, “he’s kinda antisocial. People have taken to talking to me so they don't have to deal with his moods.”

“Yes,” Leia said, eyes sad, with a tight smile. “I’ve seen your interviews.”

Kylo seethed. “If you don’t like it, you can leave.”

Rage like nothing Rey had ever felt before washed over her.

“Excuse us, Leia,” Rey said in the calmest voice she could muster. “I need to talk with Kylo for a moment. I’ll be right back.” Latching onto his arm she dragged him to a deserted dressing room. Letting go, she turned on him. “What the fuck is your problem!”

“There's no need for you to explain my behavior to her,” he said angerly, turning away.

She jerking him back not let him out of this. “Of course there is when my partner decides to treats everyone around him like they're beneath him.”

“She deserves it!” he shot back, shaking his head, disgusted. “Rey, you don’t understand.”

“I don’t have to understand! You don’t have to like my friends, but god damn it you will treat them with basic human kindness. If you're going to act like a complete asshole just because you can, to the people I care about, then you can go fuck yourself.”

“Rey,” he began, his tone lecturing but she was done with it.

“Don’t,” she said deadly serious. “I’m going to go finish my conversation with Leia. You can either come and apologies or outside of the dance floor I don’t want to see your face.”

She slammed out of the room.

Leia was still standing where they’d left her. She looked up when Rey walked back to her. “I’m sorry if I caused you and Be- Ren any problems.”

“No. He can go throw all the tantrums he wants. I’m not a toy, he doesn’t gets to be upset I have other friends. And if it he’s, I don’t have to put of with it.” She huffed out a sigh, changing the topic of conversation. “How’s the studio? Did Isabella get her cast off?”

With a final concerned look, Leia allowed the shift. “Yes, last month. Arm heal perfectly.”

Fifteen minutes later Rey had given up hope that Kylo would take the olive branch --er, the the ultimatum expertly disguised as a bludgeoning stick. Maybe it was for the best. She was getting a little to attached and he’d be gone, out of her life in the next couple of weeks. Sooner if she got kicked out of the competition.

She was saying her goodbyes to Leia when he stepped up behind her, crowding against her back but not quite touching. She looked up at him, watching his jaw work as he stared at the person that was one of the most important people in her life.

“I’m sorry,” he said after a long moment, “for being discourteous before.”

Rey signed, sagging against Kylo and closing her eyes as the tightness in her chest loosened, a rush of warmth taking its place.

“That’s quite alright,” Rey opened her eyes at the catch in Leia’s voice. There were tears in the older woman’s eyes. “I’m sorry for springing myself on you like this. I just wanted to see you, see the both of you.”

“Leia,” Rey asked concerned, straightening and going to the woman’s side, “are you alright.”

“Yes, yes,” Leia waved her off, digging in her purse for a tissue. “I’m just so _happy_ for the both of you. I’ve never see you-- You dance so well together. You guys are favorite of both the children and the adult classes. We’re all voting for you.”

Rey stated. “Do let them waste their money--”

“You are not a waste.” Leia shot Rey a reprimanding look. “You got here all on your own.”

“I’ve been lucky to have people who’ve believe in me. And a phenomenal partner,” she wrapped an arm around Kylo’s waist. After a moment’s hesitation he draped his along her shoulders.

Leia’s lips pinched at Rey’s near constant pawning of her achievements onto others.

Kylo’s bent to whisper in her ear. “Are you ready to go back to the hotel? We may have just enough time to grab a bite before afternoon shoots.”

Rey nodded stepping forward to give Leia a finally hug. “Thank you for coming by.”

“Not a problem." Hesitantly, glancing at Kylo, she asked, "I was hoping it would be alright if I came to the tapping tomorrow night?”

“No,” Kylo gasped.

“Kylo,” Rey scolded.

He glared and looked away. “Fine,” he bit through gritted teeth. With a glance at Rey he said, “I’ll meet you in the hall.”

Rey rolled her eyes at his retreating back. It always seemed to be two steps forward, one back with him. But at least they were moving forward.

* * *

 Maz sage, just-before-the-get-on-stage advice this week was to really kiss.

"What!" Rey gasped, feeling blind-sided. 

"This is a story about two people finally letting go of their reservations and committing to a relationship," Maz said patiently. "If you fake a kiss on stage the audience will know it."

"Then why would you have us practice with the fake kiss all week," Kylo demanded hands on hips. 

"I wanted to save the real thing for the show," she answered pragmatically. Looking between the shell shock glaze on Rey and the hair pulling stance of Kylo she shrugged, "you can follow my advice or not, it's up to you. Now I need to go take my seat. Break a leg."

"Cagey old woman," Kylo griped. "Springing it on us last minute and expecting us to do it."

"I don't mind," Rey said softly. Kylo looked at her gobsmacked. "If Maz thinks it's a good idea, it probably is. Unless you don't want to?"

"I didn't say that," Kylo defended quickly looking away, his cheeks darkening. "I just don't want you to feel forced."

"Then we're--"

"Kylo, Rey, you're on," a stage hand prompted. The nodded making their way to the stage to take their position. 

It was strange. They must have gone over the dance a hundred times but performing it on stage was completely different, more..something. Impactful? As if the very air crackled in expectancy. She noticed it during the first week of live shows and had chocked it up to opening nerves. Three weeks later it was still exhilarating. Maybe it was the crowed, Rey reasoned. Having fifteen hundred people all adding their own emotional eight to ones art was humbling at the same time making her want to strive to put everything out on the floor, to be perfect not only for herself but so that the audience watching would feel something memorable. 

The music started.

[I Can't Make You Love Me -Dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xk8ImwtnCug)  **very** beginning. Mute.

[Song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5rzdS-FIXw) 19sec.

* * *

 

Her lips tingled for the rest of the night.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No, seriously, good or bad. I love hearing from you guys.


	5. Too Damn Hot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you dancingfudgemunkie for your comment. I hope you like this chapter!

The text alert on Rey’s phone woke her a half hour before her alarm Saturday morning. Grumbling over who would be texting her this early she nonetheless reached an arm from her blanket cocoon to grab it.

Wincing against the sudden brightness of the screen she opened her messages with half closed eyes. I was from Maz,

_Practice canceled 4 2day._

That was strange. Maz was typically really good at giving them a heads up for schedule changes. Rey what debating calling her to see if everything was okay when her phone vibrated in her hand.

New message, Kylo, _Do you want to get breakfast?_

Rey sat up in bed the phone clasped between fingers that had suddenly gone cold. Reading the message again she frowning at the pounding in her chest knowing she’d never get back to sleep now.

Waffling for a good ten minutes weather to reply or not, she rolled herself out of bed. Going to the kitchenette she tossed a heaping spoonful of  instant coffee in a cup, filled it with water and set it in the microwave fore two and a half minutes before hopping in the shower.

She heard the timer go off as she was rinsing shampoo from her hair and shaved while the conditioner was setting. Hair wrapped in a towel she heard her phone go off again. With some trepidation she went to where she left in on the bed.

Kylo, _You up?_

There was no way she’d be able to ignore him twice, especially when it was after the time he new she woke up. She replied, _Yes. Already ate. Going to study 4 test._

Rey was doctoring her coffee when the next message came in.

_Lunch?_

She wanted to type yes. She wanted to type no. She wanted to curl up under the blankets until this unwanted feeling in her chest went away. Instead, with a frustrated sigh, she settle for _We’ll see_ and chucked the phone back on her bed.

So she wasn’t a complete liar she grabbed a granola bar from her stash along with her coffee and settled down with her laptop to study. The test wasn’t until Friday but Rey had learned to take advantage of any free time she was given. And if it kept her from making a complete twit of herself in front of Kylo, all the better.

She had always known he was attractive. For heaven’s sake, she had spent more than her fair share of time wrapped around his body and the guy was definitely movie star quality. However, whatever attraction she had felt for him had been heavily tempered by his holier-than-thou attitude, then, more recent, the closeness they were sharing as friends. That all changed with the stupid, ill advised kiss.

Now every time she looked at him she blushed. Every time he touched her if felt like a live wire going off underneath her skin. And dance involved a lot of touching and looking. She had been twitching so much in practice yesterday even Maz had questioned what was wrong.

‘Oh nothing,’ Rey had wanted to answer, ‘just a mild case of puppy love turning into a full blown crush.’

She hadn't of course. She didn’t want to see the pity in either one of their eyes or face the rejection that was bound to come from Kylo. He probably wouldn’t be cruel about it, she liked to think he respected her at least that much after all this time. It would just be better for everyone if she dealt with this like everything else in her life; on her own.

‘Maybe a day away from Kylo is the perfect thing to get my emotions back on track,’ she thought, sipping on her coffee as she went through her digital flashcards. ‘Now all I need to do if find something that makes me unavailable for lunch.’

* * *

Rey’s brilliant plan consisted of taking three buses across town to the New Hope dance studio to surprise Leia. She had surprised her alright along with the 11:30-2:00pm youth dance class. There were a few new faces since the last time she's been in but many more that remembered her infrequent visits. They were all hesitant of the girl the had seen on TV until Isabella, the fiery 8 year old with the newly healed arm, had launch herself onto Rey’s back and that was all it took for the rest of them to welcome her back into their fold. Rey had spent the rest of the class assisting Leia with the kids.

She also stuck around for the 3-6:30 advanced youth class for 13 to 18 year olds, giving pointers when she could. It felt strange though. Most of these students had had more training then she herself did, a couple of them were even quite a bit more talented than she was. And being only a year or two older then some of them, they felt comfortable gabbing to her about how the competition was going and to gush over how hot Kylo was. When the line of questioning turned a little too mature for her her sanity, she excused herself to begin working on the broken down computer.

And that's where Leia founder her at close to seven-thirty.

“Rey, don’t you need to get going?” Leia’s concerned voice called from the front of the building. “It’s starting to get dark.”

“It’s fine, Leia,” Rey called back, eyes completely focused on the mass of wires and computer parts in front of her.

“You know I don’t like you using public transportation at night.” The woman’s voice was closer and Rey looked up to see her mentor leaning against the door jam, her arms folded in front of her.

Rey found herself thinking, not for the first time, how pretty her friend was was. Her silver hair was pulled back from her face and she was dressed casually but elegantly in black. She really hadn’t changed all that much since the first time Rey had seen her, dragged into the dance class at the age of six by another no nonsense, good hearted woman. She still missed Gene terrible, even after almost ten years. She, along with Leia, had been the closest things to a mother Rey ever knew.

“I’m almost done,” she placated with a smile, even though it was far from the truth. It would take her another solid hour to get everything soldered back down and the pieces reassembled but there was no need to worry her needlessly. She had taken the bus at night more times then she could count, she’d be fine.

Instead of arguing, it was a daily toss up between the two of them who was more stubborn, Leia pinched her lips and left her to her work.

* * *

 His phone ringing killed the music running though his headphones. With a growl he dropped the barbell with a crash and clicked the microphone on from the headphone.

“Yes,” he barked, panting, really not in the mood for idle chit-chat right now.

“Ben?”

The voice was feminine and older. “Who is this?” he demanded.

“It’s mo-- It’s Leia. I need your help.”

“No,” he dismissed out of turn. “How did you get my--”

“It’s about Rey,” she interrupted.

His insides went cold. “What’s wrong?” He was already ripping off his gloves and gathering his things.

“She’s at the shop and it’s getting dark. I don't want her going home alone on the bus.”

“I’ll be there in twenty.” He hung up.

* * *

Twenty-three minutes later he was tapping on the the tempered glass of the front door. Not a minute later a warped figure appeared and a key was turning in the lock.

He looked down at his mother with a frown, “where is she.”

“In the back,” she pointed as he brushed by her. “I would have taken her back myself but the Falcon is in the shop again.”

“You still have that thing,” he said disgusted. The Falcon was a ‘77 ford his parents had bought when they first got married. When he was a kid the thing was a pile of shit, twenty years later he was amazed it hadn't been condemned. “You have the money, replaced it.”

“Ben, it was your father’s--”

“Don’t call me Ben,” he hissed over his shoulder as he followed the hallway past the two studio to the back offices.

“So, you haven’t told her yet. Do you think that wise?” Leia scolded on a whisper.

“Kindly stay out of my business,” he snarled.

“The longer you leave it the harder the truth will be to tell. And to hear.”

“I mean it, Leia. Drop it.” He didn’t turn around but listened to her footfalls veer off as he continued forward.

He heard Rey before he saw her and something tight inside him loosened. Turning the corner he just watched her muttering to herself under her breath, kind words that came out as near threats as she tried to coax the parts into cooperating with her. Slowly the frustration he had been feeling all day vanished.

He’d been stand there for a few minutes when her head came up suddenly and she turned to the door. The frown melted into a look of shock and she blurted out, “what are you doing here.”

Hiding a smile at the open emotion on her face he shrugged off the wall he’d been leaning on. “Leia asked if I’d come pick you up.

“She worries too much,I would have been fine.” She looked away, flushed, “she shouldn’t have called.”

“You’re right,” he said, slowly coming to stand on the opposite side of her works space, his presence demanding her attention, “you should have been the one to call me when you knew it was getting late and you didn’t have a ride.”

“I would have taken the bus,” she looked up at him, her eyes open and honest and a bit shy as she continued, “I don't want to bother you.”

“You’re safety will never be a bother to me.” He wanted to kiss her obstinate mouth but didn’t want to scare her away like the last time. So, to break the tension, he took a step back before his body over took his mind. “Are you ready to go?”

“Uh--” she blinked a few times looking down at open circuits before her. She bit her lip before starting to stand. “Yeah, let me put away--”

He help up a hand to quiet her acquiescence, “we’ll leave when your done.”

She smiled gratefully up at him settling back into her seat. “I’ll just be a few more minutes.”

“Take your time.” She raised her hand in acknowledgement of his words, already focused on her work. He backed out of the room, more so to give him some room to cool off then actually wanting to leave her alone.

“She said she’d 'just be a few' over an hour ago,” Leia said softly, standing just out of sight of the doorway. “I’m making tea if you want to use the shower while you wait. It looks like I interrupt you during a workout.” They stared at each other for a long minute. “You don’t even have to talk if you don’t want to.”

He sighed running a hand through sweat stiffened hair. “Fine.”

* * *

 He was sitting across from his mother, a cup of untouched tea in his hands, and the end of his hair dripping, not talking when Rey came in. Kylo stood and went to the sink to dump out his tea.

“Got everything handled?” he asked rinsing the cup and setting it in the dish drainer.

“Yes,” she answered pulling a USB from her pocket and setting it on the table in front of Leia. “R2 is up and running but I downloaded all your stuff and backed it up to the new guy. This is just a the backup’s backup.”

“Thank you, dear,” Leia said standing and giving the younger woman a hug. “Don’t be a stranger now. The kids loved seeing you and so did I.”

“I’ll try and come around more often,” she promised hugging her back.

“Ready to go?” Kylo asked softly hooking his gym bag over his shoulders. Rey nodded and Leia followed them out, locking the door behind them.

“I’m sorry it took me so long,” she apologized as he lead her to his car, a sleek black number crouching on the curb in front of the studio opening the passenger door for her.

“Not a problem,” he said tossing his bag in the backseat. Circling around he got in on the driver side, starting the car and pulling into the evening traffic. “Are you hunger?”

She was famished but wasn’t going to say so. “I have snacks in my room.”

“Look, I know you’ve been avoiding me--”

“I have not,” Rey said too quickly.

“And I just want to know why. Is it because of the kiss?”

“No,” she said, guiltily looking out the window.

“You said you were fine with it,” he pointed out calmly.

Her hackles went up, “I just said it wasn’t about the kiss.”

“I’m not stupid, Rey,” he snapped. “We were getting along great, we kissed and now we’re not getting along. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist.” He sighed, lowering his tone, “look, I know you don’t like to be touched. And I’ve noticed when we’re learning a new routine, you’re hesitant to touch me. If I crossed a line--”

“Look, I’m embarrassed, okay!” she yelled folding in on herself. “On stage, when you kissed me, I turned around and tried to eat you alive. On live tv. And I just...” her voice dropped down to a whisper, “I don’t want to mess what we already have up.”

“If you don’t want to bring it up again, fine,” he said softly, his hands white knuckled on the steering wheel. “But, just, if you want… I’d gladly kiss you on stage again. Or off. I’m not choisy.”

He felt her hot glare coming from the passenger seat. “I don’t do casual flings.”

He pulled over and slammed the car into park bending over the center console to pull her into a scorching kiss. She gave as good as she got and they somehow almost ended up with her in the driver seat.

The both came up panting.

“I don’t have time for casual flings,” he said locking eyes with her to let her know he was serious. “If you’re willing we’ll take this as fast or slow as you want. Your choice.” He nipped again gently at her lips before pulled away, “now, let's go to dinner. There's a taco truck that caters to the bar crowd on this street.”

“Dinner?” she questions, her eyes glinting as he got out of the car.

“Yes, dinner. As in ‘a date’ dinner. As in I buy you food and you don’t slip money into my wallet after.” He leaned an arm on the roof bending down to look at her again. “Coming?” he dared.

She hesitated. Sitting there staring at him, he knew she was going to reject him and was sorely tempted to beat her to the punch and get back into the car and take her back to their hotel and pretend this whole thing never happened.

Then the click of her buckle releasing echoed though the car and he let out his breath.

* * *

Maz breezed into the studio the next day exactly at eight o’clock with little more explanation then, “I had a personal emergency. Everything is better now. Let's get down to work.”

And she ran them through their paces hard. Lifts, spins, nailing the timing down to a hair flip. With two practically useless days down, she was not leaving anything down to chance. “This needs to look effortless but I want to guys to have fun while doing it.”

It took a lot of doing but after the wonderful work of the lighting and costuming department the final effect was dazzling.

[Too Darn Hot Dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M4oMlTpHuSQ)

The first thing Nigel did at the end of the set was turn to where Maz was sitting in the crowed, "I see you brought out the red dress again." She gave a coy smile and shrug for the camera as the host turn back to the couple. "That really was, as the song stated, too darn hot." (The rest of the judges's [feedback](https://youtu.be/XV8J-WfbOZ8?t=109).)

It was almost to the end of the show, Rey and Kylo we're both still riding the high of such fantastic praise when they called all dancers onstage. Nigel sat in his chair fiddling with a piece of paper, the result for who was in the bottom three. "I just want to tell you, you are all phenomenal dancers and the numbers on this page do not detract from that one iota. Unfortunately this is a competition, when I call your name I want to step forward. Amy and Nick, Kylo and Rey, Chris and Sabra, you are our bottom three couples tonight. I look forward to your solo's"

[Rey's solo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rXm3lGGzr8Q)

[Kylo's solo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YK4qqDcpRt8)

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and helpful criticism welcome. Also I just want to hear from you guys :)


	6. I Adore You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you Account Deleted, Account Deleted, Tehani, deepti1011 for your comments :)
> 
> all credit to the dancers, singers, and AMV makers!
> 
> edit: Just realized the song was deleted from youtube. Fixed it

Maz sat in a chair in her sunlight studio talking to the camera.

“Since we have two dances for Rey and Kylo this week I’ve got famed Latin dancer, and my good friend, Poe Dameron to assist. First they will be dancing my contemporary piece. The story is young love, where everything is new and sweet and they are infatuated with one another--”

_“I feel like an idiot,” Kylo growled, twittering in a mock interpretation of a bird._

_Rey was trying to hide a smile as she and Maz watched from the side lines._

_“No,” Maz scolded stepping forward to correct him, “more erratic. And, I never thought I’d have to tell you this, sharper.”_

_“I don’t do ‘erratic,” Kylo enunciated the word as if it left a bad taste in his mouth. “I do graceful and fluid but not erratic.”_

_“But you look so cute,” Rey cood from behind her hand._

_He glared over his shoulder at her, hearing the giggle in her voice._

_“Stop looking at the pretty girl,” Maz tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention, “and do it again.”_

_It took another three tries before Maz was satisfied with Kylo’s bird rendition, then she called for Rey. The next beat of the dance called for her to run, slide, and latch onto to Kylo’s leg. Taking position Rey took a deep breath before sprinted the three steps, hitting the ground in a perfect slide… and bowled straight through taking Kylo’s legs right out from under him so that they both ended up in a jumbled mess._

_For a second everyone froze; Rey mortified, Maz concerned, and Kylo shocked. Then Kylo burst out laughing._

_“I am so sorry,” Rey gasped, squirming to get out from under him. He arched his spine allowing her to remove her knee from beneath his back._

_“It’s fine,” Kylo chuckled, sitting up and looking her over, eyes concerned, “you okay?”_

_“Yeah,” she sighed, sheepish._

_“Good,” he smiled standing, offering his hands to help her up, “let's run it again, then.” Rey accepted the help but as he pulled her up, he pulled her in close, their stare never breaking as he ran a thumb against her cheek, “just with a little less force this time, alright?”_

_Rey rolled her eyes but smiled, ignoring the blush that crept up her cheeks at his touch, “okay.”_  

“The second dance is a tango,” Maz went on, hands clasped lightly in her lap. “I wanted it to be a companion to the first piece of the evening and Poe nailed it. This story is of a few years down the line, when the trust and intimacy has been built in the relationship.”

The camera cut to a middle aged man of Central american descent sitting in a dark room backlit by a neon rendition of the show’s name. “When Maz first asked me to choreograph her second dance week six, I turned her down.” He flashed a charming smile at the camera, rubbing his chin in thought, “I think it was right after week two, when I saw what those two could do, that I went back and told her yes. They are just so connected, it’s amazing to watch.” [Tango first practice(not the dance)](https://youtu.be/Habf_3x8bG4?t=19)

* * *

 Back stage was a flurry of activity as Kylo and Rey stepped out of the lights after their first dance. Lighting crews fixing burn outs as they happened, dancers practicing last minutes steps, and stage aids running hither and yon. Kylo never released Rey’s hand as they wormed their way though the chaos until he deposited her into the waiting arms of her costumer with a good luck peck before galloping off to his own changing room.

Already knowing the ins and outs of stage makeup, and his outfits being a lot easier getting into, he had refused the aid of a costumer liking to have a minute of quiet as he got ready before a show. As soon as he stepped through the door he was already half shrugging out of his shirt setting it on the hanger for an aid to pick up at the end of the night as he tugged on the red shirt and dark suit hanging there.

Grabbing a makeup wipe he scrubbed the highlighter necessary to pick up his face on the darker lit stage of the first dance so he could create the more intense look that worked better for the second dance. He was so busy contouring, running through the steps and lifts he was about to perform, he didn’t even realize he wasn’t alone in the room.

A gaunt face appeared into the mirror alongside his reflection and everything within him froze.

Setting the brush on the table he turned from the mirror to bow at the man. “Master.”

“What are you doing here, Benjamin.” The voice was cold, the english heavily accented by Russian. The question was rhetorical so Benjamin Sole remained silent under his teacher’s scrutiny, the air heavy with his disappointment. “To think, lowering yourself to reality television. The only boone is you had the good since to no use your real name. We will gather your things and leave immediately before you can embarrass me further.”

Ben swallowed thickly. “I am in the middle of a competition--”

“A competition?” the man laughed in derision. “This is no competition, this is farce and it ends now. The jet is refueling. If you are lucky I wont have to spend a night in this god forsaken city.”

“I’m not leaving.”

The comment hung in the air. Ben was tempted to call it back, to beg forgiveness of the man that created him and pack up to leave without question. One thing stopped him though; Rey. She was counting on him. It wouldn’t just be his place in the show he would be destroying, it would be hers as well. There had been many a evening practices where she had discuss the possibilities that winning this game would open up to her. He couldn’t do that to her.

“Think carefully if you want to continue this, _Kylo Ren,_ ” Snoke said, frost leaking through his words not bothering to turn around and acknowledge his students dissension. “If you do no leave with me, now, you no longer have a place at First Order.”

Again Ben hesitated. The First Order Ballet Academy had been his whole life for the last decade. Was he really prepared to give all that up for an uncertain future? All the years of sacrifice and broken bones for something as fleeting as emotion?

He always told himself that if he just kept practicing, kept working through the pain, he would become strong enough not to crumble under the strain of it. That he would be enough. All the while the man standing before him wouldn’t hesitate to get rid of him if he could not live up to the grueling standards necessary for being apart of the First Order.

A knock came at the door and he turned towards it already sensing who it was on the other side. “Kylo?”

Dance was his life but with Rey he learned that life could be a lot more. He wanted it so much he could taste it.

And it tasted a lot like blueberry muffins.

* * *

Rey smiled up at Kylo as he opened the door. He was usually the first one done dressing and waited for her so that they could walk back to the stage together. Her voice was bright and excited as she asked, “you ready?”

 _“_ Yes _,”_ he breathed looking at her with something soft in his eyes. “Yes I am.”

She held out her hand to him, “then lets go.”

Before he could accept it a tall, wraith like figure stepped between them. His dark eyes raked over Kylo with malice as he pushed past, “vy pozhaleyete ob etom Bendzhamine.”

Kylo stepped in front of her but she still felt the man’s sneer as he looked her over before storming off down the hall.

“Who was that?” Rey whispered, unnerved despite herself. “What did he just say to you?”

“It doesn't matter,” he muttered eye’s locked on the man’s back as his hand tightened around her’s. He did an about face marching them back to the stage.

She came to a full stop drawing him back to face you, “he made you angry, of course it matters! What kind of prick does he think he is--”

Kylo hauled her close kissing her deeply. It seemed to go on forever, warm and sweet and Rey didn’t want it to end. When a stagehand said they had five minutes to make curtain they finally broke apart with a soft sigh.

“He’s not important,” Kylo said cupping her cheek as he looked her in the eyes. “Let's just dance, okay?”

There were shadows in his eyes as he asked, his words pleading.

“Okay.” She took his hand with a smile that said she was there for him when he wanted to talk and finished leading him to the stage.

* * *

[song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nG3IbpsoIXo) for first dance time:15 sec. For second dance time stamp: 1:49

[First dance](https://youtu.be/fcdRtF2urAA?t=137) time stamp 2:17 - 3:52

[Second dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmqRX1qDV5g) very beginning

* * *

The Hostess did her speal about how hard it was to part such fantastic couple but the ultimate goal was to find america’s top dancer and blad-y blad-y blah.

Rey stood clasped against Kylo’s side. Their last dance had gone off without a hitch and had gotten a standing ovation not only from the judges but from the crowd as well. She was on a definite stage high that the next few minutes was going to ruin when she got paired with a new partner.

Not that she wasn’t excited about the prospects of being paired with a new partner but she definitely had a fare share of nervousness and apprehension. When she and Kylo were first partnered she had definitely envisioned bashing his head in with that briefcase, more than once. They had worked decently well together on stage but they were like cats and dogs off. But then that was to be expected and for the earlier part of the competition it have been taken into the account.

Now they that leeway was gone, they were expected to fall right in with a new partner and dance even better then the week before. And Rey was concerned if she was going to be able to do that. All the trials and tribulations that Kylo and she had had to work through over the course of the first six weeks were now having be condensed into days.

“Can I get the girls to step forward,” the Hostess asked, smiling at the remaining five groups. With a finally hug of Kylo, Rey walked forward with the others. The Hostess explained that they would each pick a name from the hat at that would be their partner for the following week.

The short, hip-hop dancer Rose Tico was the first to come forward, picking Peter Maul’s, a Polynesian hula dancer, name out of the bowl. The two came together, greeting each other then moved off to the side of the stage.

Rey was next and nerves started turning her stomach. She knew these people, any of them would be amazing partners. And while not really friends with any of them she was on friendly terms with everyone.

She just really didn’t want to leave Kylo, not when they were dealing so well together. But that was the name of the game and it wasn’t like she would never see him again. He would still be staying only one floor up and they’d have time to grab lunch or dinner between practices.

Reaching in the bowl she pulled out the slip of paper and read. And read it again because she couldn’t believe her eyes. _Kylo Ren._

The Hostess hovering right next to her, over bright smile still on her face, caught her hand, and with a pointed look, said into her microphone, “Finn Numeral.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know how you're liking it. What has been your favorite dance thus far?


	7. I'm Not Her

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you castles_and_crowns, ClaireLou, Hanable_13, Mccartershannon, 3todream3, Hope you enjoy! Let me know!

“In this part of the story, you guys are a new couple,” Maze instructed the new partners, sweeping across the floor as she laid the scene for the next dance. “Constantly trying to connect but never quite able to because your character, Kylo, is still caught up on a past relationship.”

Kira’s hand shot up in the air, a printed packet of storyboards clutched in front of her, "and that ‘past relationship’ is the story arch you made with Rey right?"

Kylo stared down at her as if he had finally came to the solid conclusion that she was crazy.

"What?” the pixie-cut blonde defended. “I was interested in my composition and I love Maz's work." She turned to chirp excitedly at Maz, "And I loved how you told the entire story of a relationship this season. Though I feel like ‘Hurt’ should have gone before ‘Bleeding’; the narrative and symbolism flows better that way."

Maz eyed the girl, adjusting her glasses, "we made some last-minute adjustments to the story during week two. And though I am inclined to agree, hindsight is always twenty-twenty."

Kira turned to Kylo mouth ajar and eyes filled with awe. "You guys change the routine mid-week and still made it look flawless?"

"It wasn't everything,” Kylo defended crossing his arms over his chest, distinctly remembering his original hesitance to the idea, “the bones were still there. And it did land us in the bottom three."

Kira rolled her eyes,"I was there too, that doesn’t mean anything that early on. I would bet you guys were in the bottom three by less than a hundred votes."

"We were also in the bottom three two weeks ago."

She nodded understandingly and said, as if it made perfect since, "it's the curse of the red dress."

Kylo’s brain stuttered as he tried to assign meaning to the words. “What in the hell are you talking about.”

Kira turned wide, horror filled eye to Maz, "I'm not wearing a red dress, am I."  

"Has it really gotten that bad?" Maz sighed rubbing her left temple.

She nodded sympathetically."Pretty much turned into a So-You-Think Legend.”

“Excuse me,” Kylo butted in, “but could we maybe start speaking in english so I can get what you two are going on about?”

“The Curse of the Red Dress,” Kira turned to explain. “It was the only way anyone could make sense of why you and Rey were in the bottom three both times when the dance’s themselves were amazing. Haley refused to wear red last week; she still went home but the point still stands.  Oh my god,” she gasped hands going to cover her mouth, “Rey wore red for your last dance, that’s why you guys were separated!” She whipped out her phone, “I have to tweet about this!”

Kylo grabbed her hand, covering the screen at the same time, “the reason Rey and I were separated was because we both made it to this stage in the competition. There is not mystical mumbo jumbo behind it and it has nothing to do with the color dress she was wearing.” His voice was a barely contained growl. “And put your phone away. It’s disrespectful to have it out during practice.” He turned and stormed off, taking the corner by the window and began stretching.

Kira said in an aside to Maz, “your routines, they wouldn’t have any bases in reality would they?” She though her ex-rival’s relationship was all on stage for the audience's benefit having seen the pair get in more then one heated argument in a public space.

“I’m a choreographer, not a fairy godmother,” the old woman said coyly. Then she took off her glasses to inspected them of imaginary smudges. “But they do make a striking pair, don’t they?”

“Very,” Kira sighed, letting go of her dream of asking Rey out for saving her from the renowned, self absorbed prick that was Kylo Ren.

* * *

 

“You really don’t mind playing up the aspect of the ‘other woman’? Kylo asked as they packed up at the end of the day.

“Are you kidding,” Kirra grinned from ear to ear, chest heaving as she sucked on her water  ecstatic after a great day of rehearsals. “People are going to _hate me!_ It’s going to be fantastic!”

Kylo blinked once again thrown by this cheerful pessimism. “I see.”

“No you don’t,” she smiled mischievously. “You guys were the audience favorite. People who’ve been skipping weeks are going to tune in just to see who you both ended up with. Maz, genius that she is, is playing into that. People are going to hate me, yes, but they are also going to remember me. And because they don’t want to lose you, they are going to vote for me. I can dance like crap and still be a shoo-in for next week! Not that I’m going to,” she quickly reassured seeing Kylo’s pained reaction. “Not just because the routine is gorgeous but it’s so much fun!”

“Kylo, may I talk with you for a minute?” Maz called from across the room from her desk before he was able to step out the door. Nodding his goodbye to Kira he made his way over. Maz turned in her chair, folding her hands before her. “Were you off to see Rey?”

“Yes,” he said slowly confused by her tone. “We made plans to grab dinner.”

Maz was already shaking her head, “that’s not going to work.”

Caught off guard he replied stiffly, “I don’t understand.”

“Both you and Rey have new partners you need to connect with if you are to have any chance of continuing in this competition.”

He frowned “Just because we were forced to switch doesn’t mean I have to give up spending time with her.”

“Unfortunately, it does,” Maz said not unkindly, but firm.

“I don’t--”

“This is not about you,” Maz snapped, shutting him up. “You are by far the stronger dancer and the more adept at meeting the demands of a new partner. Rey is not.”

Maz continued. “She is a soloist. Dancing with you was the first time she had a partner and it took weeks to build up the trust for me to feel comfortable giving you the grander stunts. You remember how long it took her to take that fall from the desk.”

Ben looked away, jaw tight, hating that she was right. “What do you want me to do.”

“Stay away from her. Let her spent all her free time getting to know her new partner.”

“Can I at least tell her why I’m ignoring her?”

“I’ve already advised Poe to give her this same talk.” Maz stood patting him on the shoulder as she passed. “I know how hard this will be but we both want what’s best for her.”

* * *

 

“Oh my god,” Finn Numeral choked that second day, horrified by what he had just done. “Oh my god. I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

“It’s fine,” Rey panted trying to hold back tears, holding her foot protectively. She stood -- or tried to stand but putting the slightest bit of weight on it was agony. “I just need to sit down for a second.”

“Of course,” Finn said jumping into action. “Do you want some help?”

She wanted a bag of ice and a pillow to cry, or maybe cuse, into but didn’t turn down his aid as he helped to to a chair. He didn’t try to pick her up or carry her for which she was doubly grateful.

Poe Dameron, their dance instructor for this stage of the game, knelt down in front of her slipping off the strappy high heel. He felt around and she winced when he flexed her foot to the right. There was also a tender spot just about the joint in the ball of her foot.

“Nothing feels broken,” he said as Holdo, the female instructor for a the couple’s dance, bent concernedly over his shoulder to take a look herself. “What do you think Rey?”

“I’ll be fine in a little bit,” she said with a forced smile. “I think it was more of the initial pain than anything else. I would really like to continue the routine.”

Poe shared a skeptical look with his wife before checking his watch. “It’s a little after eleven. How about we call an early lunch. We’ll get you some ice and prop your foot up for a while.”

Rey could have kissed him. “That sounds wonderful. I have a ten in my bag,” Rey directed, not wanting to get up.

“I dropped you,” Finn protested. “The least I can do is buy you lunch and a bag of ice. What do you want?”

“I’ll eat anything,” she said quickly. “Whatever's the cheapest.”

“Right,” Finn grinned, “ice pack and filet mignon coming right up.” He winked to show her he was kidding.

“And for you, my dear?” Poe asked twirling Holdo in an elegant spin then down into a dip.

“A big juicy burger,” she purred sensually up at him, caressing his face. “Extra onions.”

“Mmm, I love it when you talk food to me,” he smacked a kiss on her lips before straightening them. “Come on Finn. We must go provide sustenance for our woman folk.”

Holdo caught Rey’s eye to share a look of fond exasperation as the boys left.

With the two boisterous parts of their party gone, calm invaded the studio. Rey tried stretching out her foot gentle as the tall woman gracefully stepped though the moves of the routine.

“I hope you hold no hard feelings against my husband for his talk with you yesterday,” she said after a few minutes of compatible silence. She flashed her a teasing look, “about Ren.”

Rey winced, chagrin. “He told you about that?”

Holdo smiled over her shoulder as she continued the routine with an invisible partner. “You would find we keep very few things from each other.”

“No, I’m not mad with your husband.” Rey signed, leaning back in the chair. “If anything I’m annoyed with myself for constantly comparing Finn with Kylo.” She looked up with worried eyes becoming aware with what she just said. “Please don’t tell him that. He’s a great dancer just… ”

The other woman nodded in commiseration, “my lips are sealed.”

Rey relaxed, trusting the woman. “It would have been ten times harder getting to know Finn if all I wanted was to spend time with Kylo. And I’m really liking Finn. He’s a great guy, he’s kind and funny and sweet.”

“He’s just not the partner you _know._ ” Holdo said. “I wished I could tell you everything will work out fine with Finn but you both have a lot to over come in so short amount of time. It’s not fair but it’s the way of the show.” She came over and touched Rey’s cheek. “All we can do is have fun, yes?”

Rey grinned up at the woman. “Yes.”

* * *

 

Rey’s foot wasn’t getting any better. Poe had finally convinced her to see the doctor using the insurance provided by the show. The x-rays had shown minimal hairline fractures that were typical in dancer’s feet but they were concerned with how much pain she was in it could be a torn tendon. The doctor had cautioned her that if it was a tendon, it wouldn’t get better til she stopped dancing, in fact would get a whole lot worse. He had also recommended she get a CT scan to check the severity, if nothing else.

She sighed leaning against a behind stage wall to take the weight off her injured foot while everyone waited to take the stage as a group.

“There you are,” Finn said, coming up beside her, wrapping an arm around her hip in a hug. “How did the appointment go?”

“It went…” How did one tell a dance partner minutes before an once in a lifetime performance you couldn’t dance.

You didn't.

You lied.

Rey smiled up at him, hugging him back. “Fine. Just some bruising. Recommended more hot and cold therapy. Should be fine by next week.”

“That’s great!” Finn said relieved. He had felt terrible every time he watched her hobble around practice. “How is it now?”

It throbbed, aching deep in her toe and sending pulses of pain shooting up through her leg. “I barely feel it unless I’m thinking about it.”

“Everyone take your places!” A tech hand called moving down the lines of dancers. “Thirty seconds then we take stage.”

“Ready for this,” Finn grinned offering his arm to her.

She forced a smile back, “as I’ll ever be.”

* * *

 

[Kylo/Kira's Dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrBbtYT75cg) (very start)

[Song](https://youtu.be/UDxU0S121C8?t=40) (40sec)

Ben racked a towel over his sweat soaked hair cursing to himself as he stormed around backstage. He had told Maz to warn her, as he was still locked into ratio silence, but by Rey’s wide eyed shocked as her face was plastered on the giant monitors for the whole world to see Maz had ignored the suggestion.

Taking a bottled water from a passing stage hand he made his way to the wings of the stage.

[Rey/Finn'S Dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTev8nKtudc) (whole video)

Gods, she looked gorgeous. The black of the dress bringing out the warmth of her tanned skin and molded to her body perfectly. He was so captivated by seeing her hit took his brain a minute to catch up with what his instincts were telling him.

Something was wrong.

Usually bubbly graceful she was now awkwardly stiff as she and her new partner Finn made their final pose before walking over to the judges. Not one for being overly touching, she _clung_ to him, a hand fisted in the material of his shirt.

Kira stepped up beside him. “She danced that whole thing with a broken toe? That girl’s got grit.”

“Where’d you hear that,” Ben demanded, only able to drag his eyes away from Rey for a second to looking down at her.

She pointed to one of the large tv screens that showed a front view of the dancers on stage. “They were just talking about it, weren't you paying attention?”

One look at Rey’s face, blown up to a ten times its normal size on the monitors, and his insides went cold. “They need to get her off stage.”

“What, why?” Kira question skittered into step behind him as he took off into the bowls of the set.

Ben ignored her getting into the personal space of the stage director who, seeing the intense look in his eyes, covered the microphone of his head set. “Can I help you, Mr. Ren?”

“Have Cat get them off stage right now.”

The man frowned, “that’s not something--”

He interrupted through clenched teeth. “Unless you want to deal with the PR nightmare of having a dancer collapse on stage, have Cat cut to commercial now.” He left the man speaking into his headset, hurrying back to just off the dance floor.

The hostess was running though her closings in record time, smiling largely for the camera and subtly coming up on Rey’s other side, holding the fading woman up as Finn tried to do the same. Ben could tell the second the cameras shut off because Cat Deeley’s smile completely dropped and she took a firmer hold on the Rey, anchoring her even as she teetered in her stilettos.

Ben rushed on stage, ignoring the cheers of the fans as he caught Rey up and rushed her out of the spotlight ignoring her protests.

* * *

 

“Are we really doing the prince charming thing?” Rey groaned, trying to hide her face in Kylo’s shoulder.

“Apparently,” he grumbled under his breath. An aid scurried up to them with a chair, Kylo nodded his thanks as he lowered her into it. He immediately set to taking off her shoe, turning gentle when she winced. “Rey,” he growled once the heel was clear.

She didn’t protest simply shimmied down her nylon stockings because she knew he’d never leave her be til he saw the full of it. Someone gasped over her shoulder. She looked up, and groaned, “Finn.”

“You said it was doing better!” He accused, horror filled eyes locked on her foot that was a swollen, molten purple.

“It is,” she reassured him. “Mostly,” she amended at Kylo’s raised brow.

“Can you bend your toes at all?” Kylo demanded.

“Yes,” Rey wouldn’t meet either of the men’s eyes, “I just don’t want to.”

“Stars. Just...stay. Here. Seated. I’m,” Kylo rose from his crouch, raking a hand through his hair, “going to go find some ice.”

“Is he always like that?” Finn questioned staring after Kylo, floored by his oddly caring behavior.

“Mostly.” Rey sighted. “Look,” she told Finn, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you how bad it was. I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

He frowned. “How is me hurting your foot, you disappointing me?”

“Uh, well if I would have gone home, with the competition, and the time frame, it would have left you in a lurch.”

“So you potentially injured yourself further by staying on it?” He held up his hands, “I’m not saying losing you wouldn’t have sucked but its better than doing permanent damage to your foot.”

“I was hoping it would get better but after the doctors today, that doesn’t seem to be the case.”

“So what are you going to do?” he asked after a long silent minute.

Rey sighed, deflating in the chair. “I don’t know. I can’t dance on it in competitive capacity, I almost took a digger out there.”

“But you don’t want to give up either.”

She got an intense look on her face. “I’ve learned so much and I’m proving that I belong here.”

“But here isn’t the only thing in the world,” Finn pointed out. “This will end.”

She smiled, “you wouldn’t be trying to be getting rid of me would you?”

He grinned back in wry good humor, “I have to get rid of my biggest competition some how.” He turned serious, “Rey, you love dancing. Are you really going to push yourself and chance not being able to anymore? All on winning this game?”

“It’s not just a game, its a change at a better life for me. And I’ve already gotten so far.”

Finn sighed, understanding where she was coming from but trying to be a voice of reason. “I know but--”

“Rey Johnson?” a voice interrupted them.

Rey looked up to see a red haired man with an unfortunately pinched face. “Yes?”

He held an envelope out to her, “I was directed to give this to you.”

She accepted it noting the returned header was from New York. “‘First Order,” she read aloud. “The dance school?”

His face pinched even tighter and he sneered, “the Ballet Academy, yes.”

“Oh,” she said not knowing how to kindly hand the letter back. “I’m not really interested in joining a school at this time.” Just _turning_ in the tuition form would probably half a month's rent, she shuddered at the thought

“As if we would ask,” the man scoffed. “No, this is all for your partner’s benefit. Do give my regards to Benjamin.” With a nasty smile the weasley man turned and marched off.

“What an asshole,” Finn breathed from his kneeling position at her feet.

“My thoughts exactly.” She turned the envelope over in her hands. Besides the letterhead in red and black font and her names scrolled in the center, it was blank. Yet she knew that whatever was inside would be devastating.

So, much like a bandaid, she ripped into it quickly.

_Ms. Johnson, I have the great misfortune to have to inform you that that the man you know as Kylo Ren is actually one Benjamin Solo..._

She was finishing it just as Kylo -- no, _Benjamin_ \-- was getting back with an ice pack.

_...he has been using you to win a bet that amounts to no more then twenty dollars american and bragging rights..._

She looked up at him tears in her eyes, “please tell me this isn't true.”

He swallowed, closing his eyes and Rey's heart broke. 

... _he is a master manipulator..._

“At least you have the decency to looked ashamed.” She didn't know if she wanted to laugh or cry.

“Look,” he begged, falling to his knees in front of her, “I’m sorry, okay?”

..H _e's told me all about your history as an orphan..._

“No, it’s not okay.” Rey shook her head, even to her own ears she sounded shell shocked. She hated that, hated herself for giving another person the ability to hurt her again, and roiling anger swept over her. “You lied to me. Constantly. Right to my face. You let me introduce you to _your own mother_!" She paused, realization like a bitter balm washing over her, "she knew about this, too.”.

“No, Rey,” he said quickly. “Leia knew nothing about this, we’ve been estranged for years. Let me just--” he reached out to take her hand but she jerked back.

 _..._ o _ne as desperate for affection as you couldn't possible have stood against him..._

“No, don’t try to explain. Don’t give me excuses. Don’t say anything. Just … go away.”

“Rey, please listen--” he begged, eyes earnest and that was the last straw.

“If you wont leave then I will,” she snarled beginning to rise.

“No, no,” he raised his hand keeping her in the seat. “Stay off your foot. I’ll… I’ll go. Just...I’ll go.”

She watched him walk away. The back of her eye's stung and she ruthlessly pressed her palms against them.

How could she have be so stupid? Of course he would lie to her. Of course he would do anything and everything to win, he'd told her _that_ from the beginning. Everyone was out for themselves in this competition and it had been naive of her to think that she would somehow be the exception to the rule. What a joke. 

“Rey, are you alright?” Finn's gentle voice broke though her haze.

“Don’t ask me that right now,” she said softly, not trusting her voice. Gathering herself she sat up and looked into Finn’s concerned face. She insidiously wondering if he could even be her friend. She shook her head, hating that was now a thought in her mind. This was a competition; a stupid, dangerous competition that warped a person's mind til all they thought about was winning even to the detriment of oneself.

And she refused keep herself in it any longer.

“Can you do me a favor?” she asked Finn who nodded instantly. "Can you go see if I can talk with Nigel? I need to tell him I'm bowing out of the rest of the show." 

* * *

“So you went against your doctor's advice to dance on it anyway,” Nigel, the lead judge, asked standing in front of her chair backstage, arms crossed as he listened to the whole of her story. They were on commercial for the minute so she kept it as concise. 

“I couldn’t let my partner down,” Rey said, refusing to look at Finn who stood at her shoulder, “and I felt like I would be letting myself down if I gave up.”

“And now?” he promoted.

“I need to do what’s best for me,” she said with conviction, “and that’s letting my foot heal and not hampering someone else’s progress by partnering with them. If I can save someone from elimination tonight, that would also be a win for me.”

He rubbed his chin thoughtfully, "and there is nothing I can say to keep you on?"

She took a deep breath and let it all go. "No."

He nodded shrewdly, pragmatic to the instantaneous changes that could occur of the course of a season. “In that case, it was an absolute gem having you on my show, young lady. My best wishes to a speedy recovery. Maybe I’ll see you again next season.”

She didn’t know how to tell him she would never have this opportunity to try out again and even if she did she wasn’t sure if she wanted to. She had become disillusioned with the whole process and all she felt now was sad. She didn’t say any of that though. Instead she smiled tightly and politely said, “I’ve learned a lot here. Thank you for giving me this opportunity. I'm sorry it had to end this way.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you got from the dances! I would love to hear people's perceptions on them. Did you liked to original or did the different song add anything for you/change your mind on something?
> 
> What's your favorite dance so far?

**Author's Note:**

> I know I have 2 other WIP *refuses to make eye contract* but this one is going to be short 
> 
> Also: are there any tags anyone things I should add?  
> (To help with future chapters): did you read this on mobile or computer? How was accessing the video?


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